Tuesday, December 26, 2017

a previously written cry

I'm trying to figure out, still trying to figure out how to be a whole person, a good parent and still provide all that my children need.  I seem to have missed the mark by a mile and two more are almost grown.  I've had to run away for a moment. 

I'm sitting here trying to think, to find my peace.  I'm begging them daily to do the smallest things to help me and, at best, I get an agreeable word but then I have to ask 4 more times and raise my voice to get a half-assed attempt.  My daughter will deny I ever asked.  My 12-year-olds will either not move at all or make plaintive sounds as they drag their feet until I'm almost screaming at them and ultimately I do most of it myself.  

I'm having my normal meal at Silver Diner.  Vegetarian Chili and a side salad. .. 

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